I was sitting on the beach gazing over the Atlantic Ocean. I was on retreat with my fellow seminarian brothers at San Alfonso Retreat House in New Jersey. As I sat there praying, I asked God to bring me comfort. It had been a few days since I left home, and all of a sudden, I just felt so lonely. My family has always been an essential part of my life; it was a place where I developed my core values and where I first learned about God.
During our four-day retreat, we shared the retreat house with a young adult group. On day 2 of our retreat, the young adults' group posted pictures on the Redemptorist page, and my mother saw something that intrigued her. She texted me and told me to call her whenever I had a chance.
Suddenly there was anxiety in my gut because my mother only texted me if there was some sort of family emergency, such as a relative passing away or a car accident. I waited anxiously in the chapel, praying the rosary and begging God to grant me calmness.
And God was there to comfort me through Scripture: "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff comfort me" (Psalm 23:4). I waited until right after the last session of the retreat ended, then I rushed out to the beach, quickly sat down, and called my mother.
Gripping my rosary beads, I nervously began to punch in my mother's number. I believe that Our Blessed Mother has played a huge role in my life, so I hold onto the rosary, particularly in times of need, because she has helped me turn back to God on numerous occasions.
My mother picked up her phone and the first thing she said was, "You're on a retreat with your cousins." At that moment, all my anxiety instantly evaporated as I realized I had been worrying over nothing. It was like when St. Elizabeth heard Mother Mary's greetings and "the infant leaped for joy."
God works in a mysterious way, and he truly answers your prayer. Prayers are not useless; prayers work and indeed God does listen! That's why we must always pray without ceasing-- God hears and answers our prayers. God knows what's best for us and God will always do what’s best for us, even if we don’t understand His plan. He will not give us what he knows will harm us.
After a long talk with my cousins, I was overjoyed when they told me they were praying and thinking about joining a convent because they wanted to live according to God’s will and not their will. They attend daily Mass and were all really interested in Theology. Without a doubt, they come from a very religious family; their entire family are part of the Eucharistic Youth Movement.
It was truly inspiring to meet devout, faithful Catholics, and for them to be relatives whom I had not known about! I would like you all to pray for my newfound cousins-- Tiffany, Tina, Emily and Johnathan, as they discern their vocations in life. They invited me to take part in a Zoom Bible study, and it really made me feel blessed to have family members who show great devotion to God’s word and teachings.
This experience has taught me that God can do the impossible. At many points in my life, my faith was shaken and I started doubting, but God always pulls my heart back to him. I have experienced God in many ways, such as leaving the seminary after a year, going back to secular living and then having God pull my heart back to Him and religious life. Every time he pulls me back, I fall in love with Christ over and again. Every time my heart drops for Christ during adoration, I feel greatly loved.
St. Augustine once said, “To fall in love with God is the greatest romance; to seek him the greatest adventure; to find him, the greatest human achievement.” May God and Our Mother of Perpetual Help bless us all with their graces. And may each of us open our hearts to serve the most abandoned in thanksgiving for all we receive from God. Amen.